I have heard the statement, “Cherish these moments because you’ll miss them when they get older.” before. Of course most of that is true but I would be lying if I said that I feel that way about every single part of motherhood. There are definitely days when the feeling of being a mother has me on cloud 9! I feel on top of the world. I feel in charge of my day. I feel in sync with my child. I feel in tune with my inner self. On those days if you tell me something negative about the way I parent and I’ll probably give you an earful. Tell me something positive and we are gonna be new BFF’s. Those days are my favorite.
Then there are those days when the feeling of being a mother has me wanting to crawl under the covers and just not come out. 10 minutes into our morning and I am already wishing it was nap time. 10 minutes after nap time is done and I am already wishing it was bed time. On those days if you tell me something negative about the way I parent and I will probably cry on your shoulder and agree with you. Tell me something positive and I will accuse you of being a liar. Those days are my least favorite.
I am okay with not loving every single part of parenthood. There is no guilt when I say ” I just don’t want to parent today.” Sometimes I just don’t feel like building a castle for my daughter then watching her destroy only to be asked to build it again 20 times in a row! Do i do it though? Of course i do but I don’t jump at the chance.
When my child is older and I look back at her toddler years there are going to be so many things I will miss. I will miss the way she mispronounces a new word, the way she helps me buckle her in to her car seat, the way she likes to brush my hair after I brush hers, the way she gets really excited about opening plastic eggs. All those things and so much more are moments I am going to miss. I certainly won’t miss the times when she is just too tired to communicate with me, or the times when she wants to nurse every hour during the night. Times like those I have no problem leaving behind as she grows up.
Motherhood is such a complicated and rewarding thing to experience. Its like a roller coaster, so many ups and downs and twists and turns. The ride is so much fun but don’t let anything make you feel guilty if during this ride you think to yourself, “What did I get myself in to?”